Self Care - Writing Challenge, Day 13

I was reading a Thought Catalog article about self care this morning that really resonated with me.  Basically, the gist of the article was about how you should build your life so that you don't constantly need to take "breaks" from it in the form of self care that our society seems to push these days - all the gimmicks that there are for getting away or spending money on something trendy to take a break from it all.

I don't know about you, but I don't have the money to spend on all that junk anyway.  I'm not about to waste my hard-earned money on something like that, so I've already had to deal with this issue head on.  I used to feel so over-worked during college and in the first couple years after that I did feel like I needed breaks from it all.  I didn't necessarily get the time or have the funds to have said breaks, but I felt overwhelmed and sometimes like I was at my breaking point.  I was always stressed.  I didn't take care of myself like I should have.  Sleeping 3-4 hours a night is not a sustainable way to live.  Eating junk food when you're not at your food service job to be able to get the built-in meal isn't a healthy way to eat.  We all go out for fast food every once in a while, but I was pretty much living off of Sheetz and microwave food and chips.

Between the junked-up diet, the screwed up sleep schedule, and taking zero time to just relax for a few minutes and collect my thoughts, I was a pretty anxiety-ridden, crappy-feeling individual for a large part of my later college years and the first few years after.  I don't know how obvious that was to the outside world, but it was there.  Losing my grandma and going through a couple bad breakups during that time definitely didn't help.

The thing was, I didn't take a lot of time to really slow down and evaluate it all and figure out a better way.  A couple of times I started trying to eat healthier and exercise more, and I felt way better.  But my sleep schedule was still way off because, between a 17-20 credit schedule every semester that usually included classes and 1-3 labs (depending on which semester we're talking about), plus my work study and my part-time job at the cafeteria, and the studying/homework that went along with all of that, there just weren't enough hours in the day.

I wish I had taken the time to figure out a better way to deal with all of it.  I know I wasn't the only one with that kind of workload, so I know there had to have been a better way.

When I was waitressing after moving back to Elkins, I had a lot of the same issues.  My work hours varied a lot, so I never had a set schedule.  A lot of time I worked closing shift, so I didn't get home until close to 1 AM, then had to turn around and go in to open the next morning.  I ate like crap because even though I worked in food service, I didn't get a free meal or time to eat it like I had at Sodexo for certain shifts.  I had other family-related obligations and was on the road a lot when I wasn't working, and things were just crazy for a while.

It's not been until the past few years that I've actually gotten it together and concentrated on trying to get better sleep, trying to have better meals, and usually trying to get at least some exercise through the week, even if I don't hit my full exercise goal.  Those 2-3 things have made a huge difference in my life.  It seems so simple, but it's something I took completely for granted growing up and didn't realize just how important it really was until I got a normal routine back and could feel the difference in comparison to how I had been living.

So, to me, self care isn't about taking a break from it all.  The part from the article that resonated with me was about building your life so that you don't need a break from it.  I didn't do things in a way back then that made me feel like I didn't need a break.  Now, I've been able to acquire a job with a set schedule.  I plan meals (you've seen the blog posts!).  I try to work out when I can.  And I try to take time to do things I enjoy.  That's something I've had to work at.  For so long, I didn't give myself time to just do things that I enjoyed because I was so busy trying to be perfect in everything else I was already trying to do.  It was not a sustainable way to live, and I probably set the bar way to high for myself.  All I did was completely burn myself out.

Sleep.  Food.  Routine.  Fun.  Friends.  In my opinion, at least from my experience, those are some of the main things I need to focus on to be happy.  And those are the main things I ended up neglecting throughout college and immediately beyond.  Self-care is about finding your balance and being able to maintain your happiness.  Things don't need to be perfect.  You should always have some goals in mind to be reaching for, but perfection is not required.  We as humans are not perfect, so why do we expect ourselves to be?

Be happy, friends.  Finding your balance starts with you, so find it, and fight like hell to keep it.

Be Good

I saw a Facebook post today about a family who received devastating news in October - their father/husband/grandfather had been diagnosed with mouth cancer and had been told he probably only had about 6 weeks to live. They were asking for prayers for he and the whole family as he fights the good fight against this horrible disease.

It reminded me of a family member who lost her husband to a similar form of cancer last year - it was found suddenly, and he fought one heck of a fight before he went to Heaven.  I didn’t know him well, but I felt like I did because he and my cousin had the kind of love story everyone wants and wishes for.  Both in person and in their Facebook posts to each other (there are lots), they were absolutely adorable and made you feel like you were part of their story.  I loved keeping up with them and what they were doing.  

He was also a sort of mentor to Darryl when he played baseball as a kid.  Darryl always looked up to him, even as an adult when he really hadn’t had contact with him in years.  Gary made a big impression on him, probably more so than he realized.  So we were both incredibly sad when we heard that he was sick and later when he passed.  I remember reading the progress posts Tina shared for family and friends to let them know what was happening and showing them to Darryl, and just praying some miracle would happen.

Those are situations that are a big reminder for me that no matter what goes on with people in your life, you should never take anyone who means something to you for granted.  Life is too short. You never know what’s around the corner.  It could be something amazing, or it could be something devastating.  No one knows, and you can’t always be prepared, so you just have to live each day to the fullest. 

Love each other; don’t tear each other down.  You never know if the last thing you said to someone might actually be the last thing you ever get to say to them.  It never hurts to say a kind word or be supportive, but you can’t always take back other things you say.

You shouldn’t dwell on those things that haven’t happened yet, but you can take this into consideration when you decide how you’re going to treat people.  

There are too many people in this world just waiting to tear down seemingly everyone around them.  Most of them probably won’t change, but we don’t need to add to the negativity.  

So instead:

Do something good for someone, even if you don’t know them well.  You never know, you might create the brightest spot in their whole day.

Hold the people important to you close and make sure they know how much you love them.  

Take a second to pray for those who need it.

Happy December

Happy December! I can’t believe it’s already almost halfway through December and 2017 is almost over! This year has absolutely flown by!

I’m not really sure if I’m going to do a traditional year in review this year.  If I do, I’ll post it on January 1st, but let me just say, that while this year hasn’t had a lot of milestones, per se, I feel like I’ve accomplished a lot. 

Darryl and I have worked pretty hard to get more work done on our house.  When it comes to manual labor, it’s mainly him, and he’s pretty awesome at tackling things.  I help more with the brainstorming and planning parts of things, and I do a lot of designing how our rooms are set up/decorated. 

You’d think that this long after buying the house (we’re at a year and 8 months already!) we’d have everything just so, but that’s soooooo not the case. Most of the big furniture stays pretty stationary, but we tinker with moving other stuff around all the time. I think I’ve rearranged my half of our home office 3 times this year. I think I’ve FINALLY (literally, today) got it the way it’s going to stay.  The only room that really needs work now is our spare bedroom.  It’s usable but also is kind of our catch all room for things until we get around to find permanent places for them.  Out of sight, out of mind!

I’ve worked pretty hard this year to cut down on our money spent eating out. I’ve really worked on meal planning for the pay period and making sure we get everything for those meals and whatever household or pet items we need on one big shopping trip after we get paid, so we’re at the store less and therefore less likely to buy a bunch of little things that we don’t really need. 

I made it one of my goals for 2017 to cook more and try to save money by cooking at home, and I try to focus on simple things that don’t have a ton of ingredients (less money spent and more likely to be eaten by Darryl, who is the absolute pickiest eater I’ve ever met!).  I’ve started using my crockpot a little more, and I actually ended up using ALL of them (I went from having one to having 3 when I asked for another one at Christmas last year, then we won a tiny one at Darryl’s family reunion a few months ago) during Forest Festival this year.  

All in all, the meal planning and limited shopping trips plan has seemed to work pretty well.  I know after we go to the store that I have enough food to cook for us for two weeks (I just freeze whatever won’t keep in the fridge for that long). We don’t always follow the meal plan exactly, but the stuff is there whether we make it in the right order or not, and if we don’t use it all, it’s less we have to buy next time!

So, yeah...to some, this stuff might not seem like much, but honestly, it’s been kind of huge for us. We were wasting so much money ordering in or going out to eat, and doing it this way, we split our shopping total down the middle, he pays for half and I pay for half, and we usually don’t pay more than around $65 each (and that would be on a big trip when we need more stuff than usual!). Do that twice a month and compare the numbers to what we spend on restaurants and it’s a big deal, especially on a limited budget. 

I’m thinking of writing a bit more about it later, because my whole method is slightly more complex and could probably be fodder for its own post!

How has everyone else been doing with their 2017 goals?

The Latest Scoop

Well, here I am.  It's been eight months since Darryl and I bought our house, and I never did update on it!  We have done so many things, and we couldn't have done most of it without help from our family and friends.

Darryl and his best friend successfully put down flooring in our spare bedroom, master bedrooms, and office, and they have some ongoing projects involving the flashing and a project surrounding the stairs, all of which had problems we inherited from the previous owners but will be able to be fixed by us.  In the past few months, we've finally gotten most of our decorations and pictures hung on the walls and placed where they are for the moment, and while it fairly quickly felt like home anyway, it definitely feels like a home more than ever now.

I have already decorated for Christmas!  I couldn't wait!  The first time decorating my own house was super exciting.  I didn't do much, and we still might put some lights up outside, but the tree and some knick knacks we both had are around the living room. We're definitely not talking Griswold lights outside, but I would like to have them on the front and maybe back porches.  I don't know. We shall see what we come up with. This will be the first time I've had my own house to decorate however I want, and Darryl isn't a big Christmas person, so he's already completely handed the reins over to me in that department.

I started an Etsy shop for the things I've been teaching myself how to crochet.  It's called The Crafty Crochet Shoppe (CraftyCrochetShoppe)  It's a learning experience figuring out how to market the stuff and keep up with it, but I'm bumbling through.  I love to crochet and learned how a little over a year ago and have been teaching myself new stuff constantly.  Pinterest and YouTube and other blogs are a great source of help and are how I've taught myself everything I didn't find in pattern books.  The past few months I've been coming up with my own stuff that didn't come from a pattern, and that's been really cool!  The site link is here and I also have a Twitter for it (@CrochetShoppe1), though there's not anything really on the shoppe's Twitter yet as I'm still deciding how I'm going to go about the content of its Twitter feed.  Another place you can see shop updates and browse some of the products offered is the shoppe's Facebook page.

Criss Cross Hat - $10

Boot cuffs - $6

Hexagon Coaster - $2

Mesh Dishcloth - $6.50 

I also am working on restarting my Fiverr business, but it will have a little bit of a different vibe than it did before.  I'm still going to offer proofreading services, but I'm also going to be offering spreadsheets and things to buy for budgeting and anything else I come up with.  I'm a huge budget-er because I'm on a really tight budget, so I have tons of spreadsheets that I've come up with to keep track of everything from my checking account register to payment schedules to an actual budget showing monthly and yearly income vs. expenses.  I'm still putting it together, but all of that and maybe a few other things will be in one workbook available for purchase for $5.  Once purchased, the workbook will be able to be downloaded in either Google Sheets or Microsoft Excel format.  They work the same way and will be pretty much identical - it will just be your preference of which one you want to use.  I'm a total geek when it comes to this stuff - just ask Darryl - so I've been having fun the past couple of nights tweaking it and coming up with other ideas that people might want.  Hey, here's an idea - if you have something you think people might be able to or want to use in that same vein, comment below and suggest it!

My Fiverr also has a Twitter - it's just getting started as well (@JPriceOnFiverr).  I'll be posting content related to what my gigs are about on there - I just tweeted my first Tweet for that account the other night!

More to come, but this is just a start to my updates.  I have quite a bit of content ready to post, so look out! :)

Don't forget to post your Fiverr gig ideas! 

And if you have anything you'd like to see on the Etsy site, let me know that too! I can find patterns or come up with my own for just about anything, or if you simply want a different color of something that's already offered, I can do that too!  (And psst...If you're on this blog, you're the first to know...I'm working on coming up with a ponytail beanie like the ones that seem to be all the craze right now...it will be available very soon!)

The (Hopefully Last) Big Move!

Hey all!

I promised to write again soon, and I am now about to start fulfilling that promise.

Remember how I said there would be some new and exciting news?  Well...my boyfriend and I bought a house!  It's definitely a bit of a fixer-upper, but we both love it.  We closed on April 18th, and started preparing the main rooms the next day so that we could begin moving in ASAP.  We painted the living room, and cleaned the house from top to bottom.

The first coat of the green made me question EVERYTHING about this paint...but the second coat transformed it, and we ended up absolutely loving it, especially when paired with the yellow I picked out....so much so, that we decided to do the spare room with the leftover we had of these two colors!

A quick picture I snapped before they started moving the living room furniture in.

Plus the furniture and some more chaos.

See? The green worked out really well.  (I don't think Darryl realized I was going to take this, lol)

After that, we started moving things in from Darryl's apartment.  I wanted the living room, kitchen, and bathroom to be finished first so that we could kind of have a command central.  We lived out of the spare bedroom for a couple of weeks while Darryl and his best friend, Justin, installed floating floors in the upstairs (the upstairs consists of two rooms - one sort of leads on to the next, so we're using both of them as the master bedroom area).  I also painted upstairs, and the finished product looks like a completely different space than it did when we started.  It is absolutely freaking amazing.  (Stray piece of information: Every wall in this picture that isn't white, we painted.  The only wall in the house that didn't start out white was a brown wall in the living room - that's the green wall behind the couch now.)

I forgot to take a lot of better before pictures until things were already well under way, but I did have this and a couple of others!  This is upstairs in the one half of the bedroom.

Annnd, almost after!

The other half of the bedroom, while it was in progress.

We got this flooring from Lowe's.  It's called "Tavern Oak".

I'm in love with my kitchen.  I'll post pictures of it plus our stuff later, but right now I have boxes all over the place from where I moved more of my stuff in last weekend.

Once that was completed, we moved our bedroom stuff upstairs and started working on the spare room, then after that, the office.  I had the painting completed in both rooms long before the floors were completed (again, floating floors), but honestly, the guys really had the hard part.  The house was built in 1938, and it seems like there isn't a completely straight wall anywhere in the house, as they found out while trying to get the ends of boards to match up exactly.....I don't think it ever happened precisely the way they wanted it to. lol

One corner of the spare bedroom, post-painting.

The office, in progress.

Almost all of our stuff is in now (some of mine is still in a friend's garage, but we're slowly moving it in as we get other stuff out of the way).  It's really starting to come together!  Darryl put a bunch of his photos up a couple weeks ago, and as soon as I dig out the box mine are all in, they will join them!

Leo and Sawyer and Felix (you all haven't been introduced to him yet, but he's Darryl's hamster, lol) are all here and right at home.  Leo is ornery as usual, but he's much better behaved and happier now that he's back with me full time.  (My apartment situation over the last year didn't really work out well at all, and I ended up pretty much just in and out to take care of Leo and Sawyer and clean anything that needed done on a regular basis, and that was about it - not an ideal situation at all, and I hated leaving them there, but I had nowhere else to take them - where I was staying didn't allow them.  So now we're all back together, and it's so much better!!)  Everyone has adjusted incredibly well to the new place.  Leo is still nervous of new people when they come in, and his go-to is to jump behind the couch and stay there until the new people leave, but he's slowly beginning to come out quicker and quicker, if he even hides at all.

It's been an amazing experience so far, and I can't wait to see what happens next!

Making A Comeback

Hey all!

I hope everyone out there is doing well! It's been so long since I've been able to sit down and truly blog. I thought I was going to be able to start last summer (I look at the last post, from July 2015, and shake my head in disappointment), but instead life threw me a few curveballs that I didn't see coming, and all extra time kinda went out the window. I had internet access but not much time to put anything together, and for a long while I had some things going on in my life that were a constant source of negativity that in part made it impossible for me to write anything of value that would have been tasteful to post. 

Now though, things finally seem to be going right again - they've been starting to for a few months, but now we've got a really good feeling that everything we've been working toward the last couple months is going to come to fruition.

It might take me a few weeks to really get going (I'll be moving into a new place sometime within the next month), but I plan to start updating on all slices of my life again soon!  There are a lot of new things to share, and I'm super excited to start writing again!

News! News! Read All About It!

So, taking a short break from the TV show posts...

Goodbye for now, A-B!

I got a new job!  As of 2 days ago, you are reading the words of C.J. Maggie's newest host/server!  I'm still waiting to hear back from some of the other jobs I interviewed for, but I'm just so happy/excited/relieved to have picked up something to bring money in so quickly after finishing up my last shift (for now) at Sodexo.  I was really starting to internally panic about my financial situation, as it relies on bringing in money each week so that I can make all of my bill payments, which I have spaced out a certain strategic way throughout the month so I'm not bleeding myself dry all at once.  With the move coming up and all of the expense of that plus the expense of commuting from my current town to the one I'm moving to and my new job is in, money was a big worry.

I've trained as a host for three shifts, three days in a row, and I got to fly solo on that today.  It's easy.  I like it.  Tonight I go back in for my second shift of the day to start training as a server.

I have about half of my stuff moved out of my apartment, not counting the furniture that still needs to go.  No room in storage for all of that, so it will have to go once we actually can start moving into our new place.  Right now I'm just trying to get whatever I don't need out with each trip that I have to make to the new/old town, so that I don't have to make as many longer trips once we get the place.  I'm trying to streamline it all so that it's not quite so stressful.  This way, I can pack up the furniture and the present necessities and go to the new house when it's time, and I can move the stuff from storage in as I need it, rather than do it all in one day and completely and totally exhaust myself.

So that's the plan for right now!  I'm really excited.  It's a lot of work, but it's happening.  Keep your fingers crossed that everything stays according to plan!

This is how Leo deals with the heat this summer.

Excitement

So, a couple of years ago, it was suggested to me by a friend that I should take this Enneagram personality test.  Turns out I'm a Type 9, which is called "The Peacemaker".  When I took the test, I signed up for their daily emails, which are sent out around 2 am and have a tip or thought for the day based on your personality type.

Today, mine was a little different, and I want to do it on here.

Today, make a list of the things in your life that excite you. What kind of person would you be if you could sustain this level of excitement more often? What steps can you take to become more like that person? (The Wisdom of the Enneagram, 325)

Things that are exciting me right now:

1. I'm about to move into a new place with my best friend from high school, something that we've talked about doing since high school and college but has never seemed to work out until now.

2. Said place is back in the town I graduated high school from.  I loved my friends and being in the band and all of the things that I did in high school, but because I didn't have my license or a car, I didn't really have my freedom, and that took away from the whole experience.  I wanted out. Now I want back in.  There are so many more opportunities there for people my age than there are here, and I'm at the point where I'm dying for a change.  I usually hate change.  But I've worked myself up to it, and now I need it.

3.  I finally have the car and the license, and I've been all over the place. lol  It's amazing having the freedom to do what I want and go where I want.

4. New job.  I'm working on getting a new job.  I have a couple that I have interviewed for and one in particular that seems to be genuinely interested.  I still don't know what will happen with it, but it's still there.  I'm still waiting for their decision.

What kind of person would I be if I could sustain this level of excitement more often?  An awesome one! A responsible one.  Someone with their crap finally together and who can actually live a more vibrant, exciting life.  I'm starting to get there.  The steps have already begun...the final one that is still under my control at this point is that I just have to figure out how to balance all the stuff I'm doing with getting enough sleep because I have been exhausted.  But it's okay because I'm exhausted doing things I love, for the most part.

What things in your life excite you, and how could you realistically sustain that level of excitement all the time?  Feel free to either comment with your answer or write a blog post about it and link it back here in the comments! :)  Have a wonderful day!

What A Difference

Most of my friends who are still in college and the students that I serve at my job every day are in the thick of finals right now.  It's made me think of how my life was two years ago, when I was in my senior year at A-B (yes, there IS a hyphen there, and no there is not a "U" - I was in the last graduating class of A-B College, the year before it became ABU, and I will not under any circumstances write it any other way when talking about my time there as a student!), compared to now, two years out.

Two years ago, I was living in Kincaid on campus, studying my butt off, working, and sleeping.  And usually binge-eating junk food during massive physics, biochem, herpetology, and botany study sessions.  I was usually up to all hours of the night doing this.  I only occasionally went to parties with my then-boyfriend because the rest of the time we were studying together or trying to catch up on sleep because we had basically almost the same class schedule.  I was usually working 28-30-some hours on top of that.  It was stressful but rewarding because at the end of that - I graduated.  Four years of hard work, sweat and tears, challenges and rewards, and lots of learning about life later, I had my B.S. of Biology from A-B College.

The kicker: I had no idea what I wanted to do.

Now, two years later, I'm finally headed on the right path.  I'm pursuing my goals of becoming a vet assistant and plan sometime in the future to go on and take the classes to get the degree to become a vet tech.  I have an apartment now, and I'm planning a big move back to my hometown with my best friend from high school.  I'm single and fine with it.  I don't need the added drama of a relationship, and the only people I would even consider pursuing right now are not available to be pursued, so it's good that I'm content being single!  I finally have my license and my car.  I have freedom.  I work long hours at my main job, then come home and take care of my animals and work on my proofreading jobs that I take through Fiverr.  I'm seriously considering getting a waitressing job for evenings or weekends to make some tips to further supplement my income and make the coming months with all of this upcoming change a little easier.

It's a big difference, and I'm proud of it.  I might not be out there in grad school like some of my classmates and other people I know, but I'm happy with my life now.  I'm more confident, and I have accomplished a lot of the things that I have wanted for years.  I was always eager to get out of school and start living my life, and that's what I'm doing.  Right now, I couldn't be happier. :)

Making It Happen

Well, fellow bloggers - and anyone else who feels up to reading my lengthy post - how is everything?

It's been a super busy, productive month so far.  I am currently in the process of moving back to my hometown of Elkins.  My best friend from high school and I might be getting an apartment there together, and I'm being considered for a position as a vet assistant and some other jobs up there at the moment.  *excited squeal*  I don't really know the status of any of those at the moment, but I am both nervous and confident and excited and impatient all at the same time.

I got my license and my own car, finally.  The freedom I'm experiencing at the moment is incredible, and I'm SO glad I finally have it and can go and do what I want, when I want.

Other than the past couple of days when the weather has been crappy, I've been out to see Orion every day, even if it's just to take a couple of horse cookies out to him and love on him for a few minutes.  When there's time and it's not threatening rain or about to get dark, I've been working little by little on getting his hooves trimmed myself.  It's a very slow process because I'm a newbie, made even slower by the fact that his DSLD was flared up for a few days last week, during which I didn't want to make him put any added strain on his legs, so I just fed and Buted him while cleaning him up and brushing him (I could seriously make a mini horse out of all the hair that came off this guy).  The third day, he finally allowed me to mess with his feet more and I got a little done, but I was on a time crunch, so only a bit got done.  Then I had to work over by a few hours a few nights ago when I had planned to go out and do more, so that visit was cut to just a ten minute visit with treats and games in the field (he followed me at a walk and/or trot as I walked and/or jogged, and he got a treat - if he was behaving like a gentleman and not a brat with pinned ears).  He caught on quickly and even threw in a little hop as he was trotting behind me at one point - scared the crap out of me for a second because I thought he was acting up but then realized he was just having fun and that was it.

So I'm getting him back to where he needs to be - albeit slowly.  He's been putting weight back on since the move, and he's doing pretty well with that.  Still not where I want him to be, but it's just a long process.  I'm impatient for him to be back to normal, and I know that's not realistic at this point.  But he is definitely showing improvement.  I'm withholding pictures at the moment, but I will post some here in another week or two.  I've been taking them every few times I go out to track the changes, so I can definitely say for sure that he is looking better and showing steady improvement.  These past couple of days I've been frustrated with the rain and haven't gone out just because I know I can't really do anything in that and could do other productive things in prep for the upcoming move.

Speaking of moves, I've also talked to the B.O. where I used to board Orion in Elkins, and she has told me I can bring him back, so as soon as I find someone to trailer him there, I will be taking him back home.  He'll be there before I am, but I know I will be there soon and will be able to drive up and visit/check on him in the meantime, so it will work out.

Big changes are happening all around, and I'm more excited than I can accurately express right now!

Lazy Day

Sooo long since I last wrote.

I've had a super lazy day, laying around and binge-watching Gossip Girl (I started binge-watching it here and there a few weeks ago, and I'm now in the 3rd season on Netflix).  It was needed and I feel like kind of well-deserved.  It was a stressful week.

I moved Orion for reasons I don't really want to discuss publicly right now due to it not really being my situation to discuss.  Suffice it to say that there were goings on that I did not want to be around and did not want him to be around, and where he is now is somewhere that I feel he will be much better taken care of.  Where he is now is not necessarily where he will stay long-term, but for now it is safe and he is with a couple of horses he knows, so there is less after-the-move stress for him.  I'm focusing on saving up money to be able to put into him and get him back up to full health because he's gone a bit downhill in the past month, one of the many reasons I decided to move that I actually can throw out there.

That move was last Saturday, and I feel like I haven't really truly stopped moving since then.  If I wasn't working, I was tending to my apartment, helping out a couple of friends, or visiting Orion.

So, I've had a lazy day.  I haven't truly had one for a little while.  But a few hours ago I started getting restless and anxious and wanting to just DO something.  So I fixed myself a cup of coffee to clear the cobwebs from my head, caught up on some The College Prepster blog posts, finished up a lesson and took the exam for it (aced it!), cleaned out my email (it's been neglected for the past week), did my dishes from today (I actually have managed to get off my butt and cook for myself today - I've not been a total sloth), and put out some feelers on Fiverr for some more work (it's been a little difficult getting work on there recently since I've been off it for so long - and of late it hasn't been my first priority to market it).

This always ends up happening.  I can have a lazy day, but at a certain point in the day I just feel like I have to do something.  Anything.  I just can't sit here anymore.  Or I can.  But I have to be productive while sitting here, lol.

So now my agenda is get some blog posts written for my vastly neglected blog and all of you readers (at least those of you who are actually still interested!).  I'm still here.  Still alive.  Just dealing with life's curve balls and sometimes shutting myself off from social media so as to deal with it without social influences.  Those of you who have helped me through certain things recently though - I can't thank you enough.  I reached out to a couple of people and ended up with more helping hands than I knew what to do with.  You're all awesome!

An Announcement Regarding the Future

I've finally taken the dive and started a program that will help me pursue a job that I truly believe I will love and am passionate about.

A little over a month ago, I requested information on a vet assistant program at Ashworth College, an online school I had read about a few times.  I sat on the information for a couple weeks while I thought about it and weighed the pros and cons.

....I couldn't really find any cons.

So I applied.  And within a day, I was given access to the online portal and all of the materials I needed to set up my profile and start my first lesson of my first unit.

The first lesson is all about study techniques and prioritizing and time management and how to navigate the student portal on their website.  All important stuff.  All stuff I find interesting.  But not what I'm excited about, lol.  I'm almost through with it, and then the real fun begins.  I'll get to start studying what I need to learn to excel at as a vet assistant.

In addition to this, as soon as I can, I'm going to look into volunteering at the small clinic here in town to get some experience working there and get to know the people there.  I'm hoping that if I can get to know them, they'll give me a job when I get the diploma, or direct me to someone who can if there aren't any openings available.

So there it is...all out in the open.  Only a small handful of people know about this, so....surprise, everyone else!  I'm more excited about this than I've ever been, and it feels so good to finally be doing something again!

2014 Year in Review

I haven't done one of these for a long time, so I'm sitting down and reading through everything I've written this year (which isn't as much as in previous years, unfortunately) and reflecting on all that has changed - which thankfully is mostly good so far!

January
I started off the year at my mom's house, where I spent the better part of the Christmas holiday break.  Even though I wasn't in school, I still had a bit of break from work since I work on a college campus.  I put together a list of goals for 2014 (in all actuality though, I haven't reflected on this list much throughout the year).

Goals for 2014:
1. Get my license.
2. Buy a car.
3. Read 5 of the classics.
4. Blog more.
5. Try at least 10 new recipes.
6. Lose 15 pounds.
7. Get an apartment.
8. Take the GRE.
9. Start working on earning my master's certificate in GIS.
10. Work with Orion more and start being afraid to go faster than a trot.

Looking at these goals now, some of them became null and void at different points throughout the year (i.e. #9 and #10).  A lot of the ones that I can't mark off  yet weren't complete failures, not yet anyway.  Some of them are in the works.  I am pretty proud of the 15 pounds and apartment though.  I've wanted to get an apartment for a long time now and finally have one that I can afford with roommates that are awesome.  And even though those other goals aren't at the point where they can be marked off yet, I do not under any circumstances consider this year a failure.  Quite the opposite actually.  I feel like I've had a lot of self-discovery this year.

February
I had a lot of self-discovery going on in this month, as I realized that I was finally happy again and continued moving forward.

March
I didn't write this month, but I was still dealing with quite a bit personally (aftermath of a bad break up in which I kinda lost myself) and settling into the new role I took on at work as supervisor and safety manager.  By this point I was doing it on my own and teaching myself as I went along because the person who had those roles before me didn't teach me very much about it when I took it on.

April
This month I reflected on how I was coping with the changes happening in my life, I journaled a lot (btw, that journal is almost completely full now; I'll probably have to start another one for 2015), I realized that I really wanted to do something with physical therapy.  I figured this out when I was going to PT for a rotator cuff strain that I obtained back in October of 2013.  In that same post, I also decided to start blogging more (a constant struggle this past year, lol).

I also started doing the FMS Photo a Day challege.  Check out the tag "FMSphotoaday" to see those.  I want to do more of those next year since I've failed to do anymore this year.

I also made up a sort of cheat sheet for myself and any other bloggers interested and created a 20 Things to Blog About post.

May
I revealed that I had been working on a book that I wrote in high school.  That is not finished at this date, but I did make a lot of progress on it and do still plan to publish.  Mostly what is left is formatting for Kindle.  I have the cover photo picked out (spoiler: It's Orion). This was also when I started thinking about and eventually did get into proofreading on Fiverr.  I did that for a few months before getting too busy with work in the fall and quitting.  Perks of being self-employed with that. lol.  I am thinking about getting back into it on a smaller scale sometime soon.

In that same post there were also KITTENS! Cute little furry gray babies that are now pretty much feral thanks to their momma being scared of her own shadow.

I also talked about some TV shows here and here.

June
I made the official announcement that Orion was coming to live in the town that I now reside in, for a price comparable to what I was paying before and with much more in the way of facilities, albeit slightly neglected facilities that needed a bit of work.

"Mom, I'm moving?"

Fiverr gigs started rolling in and kept me busy, but I started pulling together what I would need for Orion's move and asked for advice. I took my last ride at the old place and came up with goals for Orion. The main goals were to get his feet in better shape and to get him to take his bit.  His feet are something I've had to keep up with, because it's just generally good for his well-being and also especially important because of his DSLD.  Bitting, not as much since I'm no longer riding him.

Before I moved Orion, I spent a day with one of the boarders at the new barn, someone I'm friends with from college. We rode and swam and got horribly sunburnt in the process. I rode the barn owner's little Paint mare, Vanna, who has since been sold.  Such a good little girl.  I miss her.

Vanna is the little girl on the left, Merrill is the big boy in the middle, and then of course is Orion on the right.

Oh, and I found out there are snakes at the barn. Black snakes. Huge ass black snakes.

And huge ass spiders.

Orion moved to his new home not even ten minutes from where I now reside.  He made some new buddies and loved it.  He also was diagnosed with DSLD, a condition that is not fun for either of us to deal with.  Before I knew he had it, and what prompted me to have him checked for it, he bucked me over his head, and I broke my collarbone.  I went home with my mom to recuperate for a few weeks after that.

July 2014
This month (I'm getting lazy with my links here because there were a lot of posts from July) I talked about my Fiverr business, posted a lot of pictures, discussed some ideas about conditioning Orion in my handicapped, broken collarbone state, and bought a lot of books.

I also finally opened up and talked about what had happened with Orion.  I had to sit on it and do a lot of processing (and overcome to wooziness that the concussion I had and pain pills I was taking at the time were causing).  But I finally wrote about it and posted it on here - with a lot of pictures.  This was before the diagnosis.  Eventually I wrote about that, too.  That also took a bit of processing, and I contemplated whether or not I was willing to risk riding him again, for his safety and mine.

Went to a river with a friend.  :)  Always fun times.  Reflected on life a bit more.  Jumped on a blog hop band wagon and had fun with it (I should do more of those this year. Hmm...).  Continued to visit with my boy, who was as sweet as he's ever been and seemed to know to be careful around my injury.  I shared some inspirational pictures/quotes that inspired me and talked about some of the things I'm thankful for in my life right now, namely Orion and the bond that I have built with him regardless of the issues that we've dealt with.

August - December 2014
There wasn't a lot of blogging during these months because I went back to work and had less time and also because I went back to live with my grandpa and had no internet again.

In September, I wrote a blog post that was kind of a rant/vent session about a sort-of friend's attitude toward the world, but it ended up being kind of therapeutic for me in the process.

In October, I turned 24 (good God, life is going by fast...). I had a lot of visits with Orion, and he was the world's biggest sweetheart.  I also found out about an apartment available with some people that I knew from college, and the price of rent/utilities/everything seemed almost too good to be true, so I looked into it...and I loved it.  It was an apartment with guys, and I've never lived with guys, so I was a little nervous about that - and some of my family was REALLY uncomfortable with that.  But I knew them and knew they were good people, so I gave it some serious thought and finally decided to go for it!

On November 1st, I got some of my stuff moved into the apartment and stayed my first night there.  Chels helped me move what I had available to me to move at the time, and we went to a Halloween concert back home that some friends of ours were playing at.  Awesome times.  It was a great night and one I'm not likely to forget, made even better by the fact that when I went home that night I was going home to a place of my own for the very first time.

I finally got a new laptop during a Black Friday sale on Amazon.  My huge old HP that is still awesome will be retired as a desktop computer once my desk actually comes to live at my apartment and relinquishes it's spot in my old room at my mom's house.  It's issues just cause it to have to stay in one place at all times.  So a desktop is the perfect job for it.

December hasn't seen much writing, but there's been a fair bit going on.

For example.  Meet this goofball.

This is Tank.  He's an English bulldog puppy born on October 1st, and I've been watching him for a little while now.  He was my brothers' Christmas gift, but since my family's landlord doesn't allow pets, I've been taking care of him until some factor in that situation changes.  I can't say I really mind.  He's adorable and a really good puppy.  Ornery as all get out, but really laid back and easy going too.  He likes to flop down on my kitchen floor and snooze the day away while I do stuff around the apartment - this is if he isn't following me everywhere or chasing my roommates feet/shoes or playing with the big dog, Milton, who is a 10 month (I think?) old lab mix and roughly about 4x the size of Tank, if not bigger.

Other news from December is that my laptop arrived.  I love it.  I put up my first very own Christmas tree in my first apartment with my roommates.  And my new cat, Leo, promptly tore it down within the first day.  He gets locked in his bathroom at night and when we all have to leave now because he's pulled the tree down three times since we put it up after Thanksgiving and has broken who knows how many ornaments and pulled off and lost who knows how many more.  Turdface.  But we love him anyway.

So that's it! My 2014.  How was  yours?

Happy New Year!

Well hey there!

I'll start this post with saying that life is really good right now.  

I have this awesome new little Lenovo ThinkPad X131e Chromebook (something I found by looking into the suggestions of achieve1dream's husband).  It's a little smaller than I pictured in my head, but it has Chrome OS, something I've been pretty interested in since I use Chrome all of the time.  So far I really like it.  I'm slowly transferring the files from my other laptop over to this one so that when my 6.5 year old HP Probook eventually dies, I don't lose anything.  I'll probably eventually pick up an external hard drive, but for right now, I'm putting that off.

My apartment still feels amazing.  I love living here, and my roommates are awesome.  Living with guys is a lot less drama than living with girls (no offense to any of the girls I've lived with before!).  My mom is a Scentsy rep and gives me stuff all the time, so I have warmers in both living rooms, my old Scentsy warmer in my room, and an old metal warmer from a little place in Beverly in my cat's bathroom. And I have more Scentsy tarts than I know what to do with.  Of course, now that I have all these other warmers and have to combat the nasty smells that often drift up through the floor from our idiot neighbors downstairs, I expect I'll go through this stuff a lot faster than I used to. 

We put up our tree the other night.  Leo has been having a field day tearing down ornaments at night when we're all in our rooms or when none of us are here (that doesn't happen often, as we all have completely different schedules.  There's usually at least one of us here most of the time).  I've decided he's going to be locked in "his" bathroom at night until Christmas is over and the tree is down, because the first night it was up, before it was decorated, he knocked it completely to the ground.  I came out to the living room the next morning, and the tree was laying on its side in the middle of the floor... -_-  Little shit...

Orion is doing well.  I think he's having a slight DSLD flare up right now, but nothing too serious.  He's just a little sore and favoring his front leg a little bit, but the other boarder who mentioned it to me today at work said that there wasn't any inflammation.  I haven't been out since the end of the week a couple weeks ago just because of time constraints, but I'm going to go out in the next couple days to check on him and love the crap out of him.

The barn is actually coming along really nicely.  One of the other boarders has 5 horses there right now, and she and her family have been footing a lot of the bill for getting electricity, water, etc. turned on.  The owner doesn't have a lot of money, so this has been a Godsend.  They've also done a ton of the cleaning that Chelsie and I wanted to do over the summer, up until I broke my collarbone and couldn't do the heavy lifting anymore.  With her whole family out there doing stuff, they actually had the money, means, and manpower to get it all done.  It has turned into a really nice place.  It's like a completely different barn with the lights turned on.  There's still a lot to be done, but they've improved it TONS.  I'll post pictures soon.  I have some, but they're on my phone, not the laptop, and I'm going to just wait and do a photo post, which those will be included in.

Those of you bloggers that I usually read and comment on, I'm playing catch up tonight and probably the next few days.  I haven't had time to really sit down and read blogs lately (well...actually, I could have this week, but I got re-hooked on The Walking Dead and House, and so I've been watching those and Christmas movies on TV while I clean and piddle around the apartment....oops. lol).  But I'm still interested in what you've all been writing about and experiencing lately, so I'm going to continue working my way through blogs tonight and in the days that ensue.

I really can't believe that it's Christmastime.  I really can't believe that this year is almost over!  How the heck did that happen?  It seems like we just started January a couple months ago....this year absolutely flew by.  I have to start writing a year in review post soon... I've been sketchy on those the past couple years, but I'm doing on this year.  Too many big things have happened not to.

So that's that for tonight.  Expect a photo post coming your way soon, and more writing, whether it be important life stuff or animal stories.  Everyone knows I have plenty of animal stories.  lol  Or whatever I feel like writing....

Night!

A Bit of an Announcement

Writing writing writing...

Been writing a lot lately, just not a lot of stuff I've wanted to share with the world.

I have been settling in well - thanks to those of you who sent well wishes and supported me in that. :)

I'm currently sitting here looking at jobs on Glassdoor to see if any of them strike my fancy.  I don't have immediate plans of leaving my current job, and if things work out there the way I hope they do, I probably won't for a while. But I'm also open to other things if the right thing comes along.

It's not something I've talked to anyone about lately - well, actually, I think I've talked to one person, kind of in passing, about it last weekend - but I think I've pretty much decided to wait until next year to apply to PT school or any other school.  With the way my GPA was left after organic chemistry nearly killed me junior year, I'm slightly below the 3.0 that WVU insists that you MUST have in order to be accepted.  I talked to a former adviser from college a few weeks ago when he was in the cafeteria where I work, and he understood my concerns and said that they are well-founded.  He suggested I look for any kind of certifications or internships that may make me look better to the school.  He told me that in a lot of cases like mine, those types of things will give them more reason to overlook the GPA part, especially since it is fairly close to what they want.  SO. That's what I'm on the lookout for right now.  It's made much easier and less frustrating by the fact that I have internet I can get on any time I want now, and since I'm not working as many days this week and next (my own version of Thanksgiving break), I'm planning on spending a lot of time looking for stuff around here.

If anyone in or around where I live knows of anything a bio major could do that would make her look more suitable to a PT school, let me know!

****I know this is not what a lot of people (family!) are wanting to hear right now, but bear with me - I'm getting this figured out.  At least I have a direction now - and I now know I can go to this adviser with anything I need too, so that's a big plus. I'm not unhappy with this decision.  I'm actually quite comfortable with it and am looking forward to getting my feet wet in something new as I prepare for this big journey.****

Right Now

Do something. Anything.
Dance. Talk. Build. Network. Play. Help. Create. It doesn't matter what you do, as long as you're doing it. --Jessica Hagy (How to Be Interesting)

This actually describes me pretty well right now. I don't mind not being in school at the moment, but I do put a lot of emphasis on myself to "do". I'm spending a lot of time catching up on TV shows and getting to know my new roommates better, but every day, I try to do some things to fix or spruce up the apartment, write, read some of the books that I've had for years and not gotten around to, go walking (or running, when I feel like it), just overall doing things I love and things to build myself up and make life better.

Don't get me wrong - school is still a priority, but I also love my routine of working and coming home to have time to do the things I want to do. After 4+ years of putting schoolwork and regular work above everything else and majorly burning myself out in the process, I've really come to cherish where I'm at now and take each moment as it comes.

I like my job. I don't love it. But it's a paycheck, most of the people I work with are nice, and there's still room for growth there. I know it's not where I'll stay for good, but for the time being, it's convenient and allows me to do the things I want to do, so it works.

So for now, I'm figuring things out. I have a lot of different options and different directions I can go in. I'm keeping my eye out for any jobs more suited to me and considering different schools and when  I want to start them. But I'm not rushing things. It might not be what family and other people throughout my life have seen my future as, not what they want me to do, but I'm happy. And to me, right now that's all that matters.

Healthy Living

I'm turning my life around, in more ways than one.  



1) Doing things that I love.


          a) I moved Orion closer so that I can finally see him and do things with him on a regular basis.  He's less than ten minutes from where I live now.  


          b) Proofreading.  I've always loved to read, and I've always loved to write.  While I'm still working on writing more, I've taken up proofreading on Fiverr.com.  It's time consuming, but this is what I get out of it: I get to read new stuff almost every day.  I'm reading a lot, something I haven't done since I was in high school or younger.  I'm making a body of work better.  I hate coming across stuff in books that I read that is just wrong and thinking that I could have written or edited that so much better...now I am.  I love the feeling of knowing that, while it's still the author's work, the book, document, etc. is going out into the world with my mark on it as well.


          c) Reading.  In addition to proofreading, I've decided to take advantage of this extra free year before I start grad school.  I'm reading every book I can get my hands on (and I can get my hands on a lot because I have a TON that I've collected since college started that I just never had the time to read. Add to that the ones that have come out recently that are sequels to or by the same authors as books I've read in the past, and it's quite a long list.  Maybe I'll post it sometime.)


          d) Spending time outdoors.  This.  It's true that I can spend time outdoors anywhere, but there are specific places that I want to go, and very soon, it will possible for me to go to them whether anyone wants to go/can go with me or not.  


          e) Writing.  I love it.  Blogging and writing fiction are two of my favorite things in the world.  While I don't want it to be my career, I do want to keep this a prominent hobby for as long as it holds my interest and brings me this much happiness.  And when (not if) I finally do publish some of my stuff, it will be nice to potentially make a little money by doing something I love, as well as to know that what I wrote might be bringing someone, somewhere, some joy and entertainment.  That's one thing that I hope happens with this blog, aside from it being my chronicle of my life for me to look back on from time to time.  I hope that it helps people in some way, whether it's with a problem they have or just by putting a smile on their face.



2) Speaking of why I can do all of that traveling very soon without help: I have a car.  Until I broke my collarbone, the plan was to go test for my driver's license for the first time in my life two weeks ago.  Now I have to wait, but having a car gives me (and everyone involved in helping me get there) so much more incentive to get on the ball and do it.  I can't wait to be able to go where I want, when I want.  Feeling restless and nothing to do at home?  No problem.  Hop in the car and go to the barn....to a friend's....just for a drive in general...  I. Can't. Wait.



3) Applying to grad school. (Hold on tight; this is a long one!) Seriously, this is something I have struggled with since my freshmen year of college.  Not the application, but the decision of what I want to do.  Not long after my program lost its accreditation my freshmen year, I realized that my future plan was really someone else's.  Yes, I was very interested in the field of health care.  Yes, I love science, and the human body interests me.  But suddenly I realized that being a PA just didn't feel like the right fit to me anymore.  I think I kind of fell in love with the idea of going to AB for that program, going back to the town that I grew up in and loved so much, and going into  PA school made my family really happy.  Next to going to med school, it was the next best thing.  I just got swept up in it and convinced myself that it's what I wanted, when really, I didn't know what I wanted.  It ended up being a really long road figuring that out.  Along the way I considered med school, vet school (specializing as an equine veterinarian - surprise surprise!), nursing school, something in environmental science, something in GIS, and now, finally physical therapy.  And thank God, I think I've finally got it.  I have finally found something that feels right, I'm extremely interested in, and in all honesty, has pretty much been under my nose the whole time.  I was just too focused on other ideas, or the idea that I just didn't know what I wanted, to see it.  So the only thing left to be done is to take my GRE (very soon), finish my applications, send them on their way, and wait.  



4) Eating healthier.  This has actually been going on for a while, so I'm not going to dwell on it, but it's something that I've been trying to concentrate on for the past year, off and on (but mostly on - there have only been a couple of times that I slipped up for a while - the rest of the time, which is most of it, I've been doing fairly well).

5) Exercising.  I have a home workout plan that I was starting before I broke my collarbone.  A lot of it isn't really possible right now because since it's a home plan, a lot of it involves exercises that use your own body weight (think of push-ups as an example), and obviously that's not going to work right now.  However, I do plan to start hiking.  I love running, and I hope that once I'm in better shape and have lost more weight, I can take that up again, but right now, it kills me.  I'm not saying it's impossible, but it's not enjoyable.  So instead, I want to hike.  I want to get outdoors more; the trees and other plants in the woods (and this is WV, so really everywhere) are the most gorgeous green right now (we've had a bit of rain recently).  I really just want to get out and enjoy that, take it all in, and get some good pictures.  Hiking is conducive to all of that, plus I'm getting a good workout in while I do it.  I have the Endomondo Sports Tracker app on my phone and my iPod, so I can track my hikes with GPS the same way I try to track any long horseback rides that I do.  There are places on my grandpa's farm that I can go, but even more than that, as far as this town goes anyway, I'm excited about going on the trails at the new stable (more on that here).  



6) Looking for a new job.  I like the job I have right now.  I don't completely love it, but I like it.  I've been there for going on 6 years now, and all things considered, I have it good as supervisor, safety manager, and restaurant manager, but with everything else I have going on, I just don't really feel it anymore.  It was never meant to be a career, which my bosses know and understand (none of this is a shock to them; I've already discussed it with them).  I really never meant to stay as long as I have, but with this extra year before grad school tacked on, that I didn't anticipate originally, I really want something that will mirror what my class schedule will be like (i.e. day time instead of late evening/night shifts - 12am).  There's also the matter of going into a health care job such as physical therapy - while I'm not qualified to actually work as a physical therapist right now, I would like to get some sort of job in a hospital, preferrably the one here since I'm trying to establish myself here for the next few years, just so that I have some experience in that area since all I have right now are volunteer hours.  There's nothing wrong with volunteer hours, but I just feel that working at the hospital in some way would benefit me in addition to those volunteer hours.  



So there it is.  That's pretty much my life right now, in a long, rambling nutshell.  I'm happy with what I have and what I'm working towards.  The only thing I have not mentioned here is getting my own place.  Since I now have a bunch of medical bills to pay in addition to my car payments and car insurance, I'm thinking about staying with my grandpa a little while longer until I have some of that taken care of.  However, as soon as I have the money saved up and can swing it, I plan to get my own place around here somewhere.  I'm more than ready for it.  It's been overdue for a long time now.